#i dont really like how this is set up too much
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prompt: you wake up in a girlâs body and fuck your best friend
okay soooo, i got this idea from an ao3 one shot i read the other day and well, this came outta it
it may not be everyones cup of tea but i always loved gay fics where one guy magically turned into a woman??
IDK
ALSO IM REALLY DEPRESSED SO I LIED ABT GETTING TO UR REQUESTS DONT HATE MEEEE MY BOOBIES <3
warnings: SMUTTTT, mentions of witchcraft and body switching
you and quackity were best friends from a very young age. you and him were inseparable, as if you were one person.
the two of you went through school together. everything changed when his youtube career took off and he changed his focus to that which of course you didnât mind. you thought it was so awesome the way he was passionate about this.
the two of you were so close that living together through college eventually turned into living together as adults. now, you were working at a law firm as an intern while alex pursued his online career.
truthfully, you were in love with your best friend. you had been from a very young age, it was only natural for you to fall so hard for him.
on a drunken night, you decided to come clean. you told him how much he meant to you. you confessed that you were in love with him.
he smiled sadly and hugged you close
âi wish you were a girlâ
those were his drunken words and the two of you never spoke about it again
but within your friend group, everyone liked to tease the two of you as if you were gay together. of course you would enjoy every single interaction like this, hell you two were even dared to kiss once!
it was too easy to fall for your best friend
â
you had gone to visit your family in mexico for a few days and finally you were home. you walked into your shared home as quickly and quietly as possible so that you didnât wake alex up.
your trip was great. you got to catch up with family and spend some quality time together.
while there, you confessed to your favorite and closest cousin about your feelings for alexis. she was very accepting of your sexuality and even encouraged you to go for it.
you filled her in on what happened when you did confess to alex and her eyes lit up with a devious look. she had an idea and although you were a bit skeptical, you agreed.
you knew she was learning the traditions of brujeria in your family and you were really interested in it. but what she wanted to do was crazy. she wanted to try something new and of course you agreed, not expecting anything to come of it because of how impossible it seemed.
so the two of you spent the last day of your trip together so that she could work on it. and well, you went home that same night.
the next day, you woke up like any normal day. you sluggishly walked to the bathroom and relieved yourself. you felt a warmth trickling down your legs and you were speeachless
âaw shitâ you murmured to yourself as you knelt down to clean the floor of your piss
you couldnât believe it worked
you looked at yourself in the mirror and loved what you saw. your face was a bit more round, your hair reached your ass now, and you had a great rack. you were ecstatic, practically gawking over yourself
and then the fear set in when alex knocked on your door saying that breakfast was ready
âuh⌠im not feeling well! go ahead and eat without me, thanksâ you said, trying your hardest to deepen your voice
âare you sure? whats wrong? your voice sounds weird, are you sick?â he asked worriedly
âi think itâs a virus or something, donât worryâ
âi wanted to have a little day with you since youâre back from mexico⌠i guess we could postpone it until you feel betterâ
âthanksâ you said quickly, hoping he would go already
âare you⌠going to stay in there all day? i mean, at least let me in so i can take care of youâ he sighed, resting his head against the door
ân-no! im fine, really!â
âcâmon y/n, let me in so i can at least make sure you donât die in thereâ he laughed
there was absolutely no way to hide this
âokay but⌠please donât freak outâ you said as you quickly started to look for a t shirt to put on
all you had on were loose boxers but they felt weird. you didnât have any bras, obviously, and so you had no choice but to wear a tight fitting black wife beater
âi wontâ alexis said softly
âclose your eyesâ
he obliged and you carefully unlocked the door, leading him into the bedroom
âbefore you open your eyes, i think i need toââ
he opened his eyes and his mouth dropped
âum⌠whatâŚ?â
âplease let me explain!â
âokay, who are you⌠i get it if you wanted an autograph or a picture but what the hell?? why are you in my house right now?â
âwhat?⌠alexis! iâm not some crazed fan that broke in! itâs me.. itâs y/n..â you exclaimed
âno youâre not, what the fuck are you talking about! look, i donât believe in hitting women but if you donât leave my goddamn house in three seconds, youâre toast buddy!â he yelped and picked up the nearest weapon like thing which just so happened to be a lamp
you blinked at his attempt at being tough and burst out laughing uncontrollably
âlady! i am so serious! what the hell is wrong with you? oh my god⌠you escaped a mental hospital and youâre using my house as a hideout arenât you?!â
you couldnât stop laughing at him, this was just way too hilarious!
âokay i am dialing 911ââ
âwait! please⌠just listen to me okay? i didnât expect for this to happen⌠but itâs me. itâs y/nâ
âyou really are a nut, arenât you?â
âi can prove it! look⌠itâs the matching tattoo we got when we were 18â you pulled your t shirt down to show the tattoo littered on your collarbone
he put down the lamp and sat on your bed. he didnât know what to think. he nervously ran his hand through his hair
âoh god⌠how did thisâ?â
âiâiâ you stuttered, trying to figure out if you should tell him the truth
âi swear you didnât have tits the last time i saw you⌠and your face looks so⌠differentâ he softly held your chin in his hand, studying your newly feminine features
âbrujeriaâ you blurted out, cheeks flushed with his touch on your face igniting a fire inside your chest
âw-what?â
âi⌠my family does brujeria and i tried this new thing and i swear i didnât expect it to work! ive heard of it working but ive never seen it for myself and wellâŚâ
âso⌠you did this to yourself?â
you nodded, almost feeling shame
âbut why?â
âi had a talk with my cousin in mexico and well⌠you told me you wished that i were a girlâŚ. and i thought maybe things could be easier this way, better, even. i really didnât think it would happenâŚâ
âsoâŚâ alexis cleared his throat, âyouâre um, fully a female now?â his face turned red in an instant and you couldnât help but laugh
âyeah, i mean, i went to use the bathroom and thatâs when i noticedâŚâ
âno wayâŚâ
âyeah..â
âand so⌠why are you practically naked?â he laughed nervously, wiping his sweaty palms on his pants
âdude! look at these fucking tits! i donât own any bras and god theyâre already giving me back pain.. i need to get dressed so i can go back and see my cousin or see a doctor! i canât stay like thisââ
he stayed quiet for a while before saying breathlessly,
âi donât want you to goâ
âi⌠i have to go⌠i have to fix thisâ you said quietly as you began to rummage through your drawers to find suitable underwear since you obviously didnât own any panties. you changed into boxer briefs and shrugged. it would have to do
alex quietly stood from where he was sitting and he stood behind you, looking down at you with a look on his face that youâve never seen before
âgod.. youâre so tallâ you whispered as you stopped what you were doing and looked up at him
âyouâre so fucking short, itâs really cuteâ he smiled before grabbing you and holding you over his shoulder
âhey! what the hell! put me down!â you squirmed in his arms and that earned a harsh smack to your boxer clad ass
he took you to his bedroom and practically tossed you onto his bed. he stared at you with the same look as before, his eyes filled with lust, as he threw his beanie to the ground and took off his t shirt. he threw his shirt somewhere behind him before slowly making his way to you.
you were sat up with your knees to your chest against the wall
âu-uhm.. why um.. why are we here? i told you i have to go!! i have to fix this shitâ you rambled nervously, warning a deep chuckle from alexis
âshh, just let me admire you..â he was now next to you on the bed as he carefully tucked your hair behind your ear
âwhat are we doing alex?â your whisper dissipated into the thick tense air surrounding the two of you
alexis didnât respond, instead he gently grabbed the hem of your t shirt and pulled it off of your body. your new set pf tits were now on display, your nipples perking up instantly as your best friend trailed his fingertips along your chest. you hiss at the sensation of his cold hands and you feel something beginning to build up inside, just beneath your bellybutton
âo-okayâŚi get it, it get it. this is about that stupid thing we talked about! look, it was funny back then but right now itâs not okay, i need to see my cousin or a fucking doctor!â
âyou mean that thing about how if one of us woke up as a chick then weâd fuck?â he laughed, now trailing his fingers underneath your chin
ây-yeah but it was hypothetical! i didnât think weâd ever actually be in this situation i mean, itâs just not normal!â
âso, do you want me to stop?â he murmured against your neck, leaving tiny butterfly kisses there
âi-i donât know okay? but it doesnât help when youâre touching me and you have your lips on me and god damn i forgot how sexy you looked without a shirt onâŚâ
âyou think this is easy for me? feel what you do to me, baby girlâ he guided your hand to his clothed dick and your eyes went wide with how hard he was
âoh my god⌠stop it! fucking shit dude! you canât just have me touching your dick! a-and now im fucking leaking or something, i donât know! itâs all warm and wet down here! i donât know what to do!â you complained, almost whining, not realizing that what you needed was him inside of you
âyeah? i bet your tight little cunt is soaked, isnât it?â he asked, almost hovering above you
you couldnât respond, you were too overwhelmed with so many emotions at once
alexis began to lean into you more and more and god it was getting harder to resist him as his strong cologne infiltrated your little brain
finally, his lips were on yours. he kissed you so gently, as if at any moment you could break. you pulled him closer to you and wrapped your arms around his toned back, melting into him
one of his hands balanced him above you while his other hand began to play with your perky tits. you were grinding into him as he rolled your sensitive nipple in between his thumb and forefinger
âo-oh my god! that feels amazing..â you bucked into him more, rubbing your cunt against his leg. you were so frustrated and begging silently for any kind of friction
âslow down princesa, thereâs no rush. i promise ill take care of you, okay?â he said in a sweet voice that only turned you on even more
you nodded and your eyebrows furrowed together as his mouth was now attached to one of your boobs, the other was pinching at your already sensitive nipple. you let out soft whimpers as he pawed at your chest delightfully
âg-god⌠this feels so wrong but so fucking goodâ you said breathlessly, earning a little laugh from the boy above you
his lips kissed and sucked a trail lower and lower until he reached your boxers. he licked his lips and hooked his fingers under the waistband, sliding them down your legs. you were trembling as he kissed down the front of your pussy. finally, he ran his tongue flat against what you now knew was your clit. your hands instantly buried themselves in his soft hair, pulling it in the process
âyou okay?â he asked, pausing for a second. you nodded furiously and he got back to work instantly
his tongue ran circles around the bundle of nerves that were now throbbing. you bucked your hips further into his face without even noticing
suddenly, you felt a finger at your entrance. it stung ever so slightly and immediately turned into pleasure as he curved it upwards. he pumped his finger into you and continued lapping at your swollen bud. the second he added another finger, tears were rolling down your face
âjust like that! oh fuck..â you cursed, back arching as you reached up and clung onto his bedsheets
alex was basically making out with your clit now. his two long fingers were curved perfectly inside of you. you were bouncing on his fingers at this point. it all felt so so good
âyou taste so good y/nâ alex said as he came up for air momentarily
your hands came down and were now shoving his face in between your trembling thighs. his tongue moved even faster now, syncing with his fingers that were plunging into you.
you were restless, squirming and writhing as the sound of your moans and your wetness filled the room. you felt yourself chasing your climax. your thighs clamped shut, forcing alex to stay right there and not move an inch.
as your walls clenched around your best friendâs fingers, alex was being completely engulfed in your sweet pussy. his fingers curved up one more time inside of you and your body paused completely.
you saw stars and felt yourself leaking cum out onto his fingers. you caught your breath and closed your eyes. after a few moments, alex broke the silence
âso⌠was i any good?â alex asked, wiping your juices from his chin, a shit eating grin on his lips
âshut your mouth and take off your pantsâ you rolled your eyes
alexis laughed loudly and obliged, gaking off the remaining clothes he had on. you instantly sat up on your knees, your attention completely on him
you took over, pushing his pants and underwear down in one swift motion. his erection sprang free, and you stared at it with a mix of fascination and hunger. He watched your gaze, feeling a surge of pride and desire that made him ache even more
âholy shit! dude, your dick is huge!â you said in awe, almost drooling
âopen up princessâ he smiled and pumped himself gently
you opened your mouth gingerly. as he lay his tip on your tongue, your hand wrapped around the base of his cock. your other hand cupped his balls, grabbing at them
âyou⌠you sure you havenât sucked a dick before? youâre doing this so wellâ he grunted
âbelieve it or not, your dick is the first to ever touch these lipsâ you laughed and took him into your mouth almost entirely
alexis whimpered, one of his hands pushing the back of your head onto him further
of course you choked but alex was still enjoying this and you were definitely taking in every little whiny sound he made
you sucked his tip gently, and looked up at him through your doe eyes with your pupils blown completely, your lips wet and swollen, hair a mess, and alex almost came at the sight
âlay downâ he said gently but firmly
you did as he told you and alex propped your legs up as if he were going to eat your pussy a second time. instead, he slipped himself in between your legs and hovered over you
carefully, he entered you, savoring the tightness that surrounded him. you gasped, your eyes fluttering shut as you adjusted to the sensation of his thickness stretching hou. he waited, giving you a moment to breathe, before he began to move.
alex was in pure bliss, loving how warm and tight your cunt was. he completely forgot that this was your first time doing this, involuntarily speeding up before immediately stopping as you made a sound of pain
âokay look i respect you, you have game dude but jesus christ you need to fucking chill ! iâve never done this shit before⌠at least not with a pussyâ you tried to laugh off the sting
âi am so sorry y/n, you just feel so fucking good around me. i didnât mean to hurt you, princesaâ he spoke with a worried expression on his face
âsit back, okay?â you said suddenly and alex laid down, watching you crawl into his lap. a smirk made its way onto his face as he realized what you were doing
you straddled him, slowly taking him into you as you sat all the way down on his lap. you still felt some pain but it wasnât as bad. you slowly lifted yourself up and slid back down again, your hand on his belly as he watched you intently
you gasped as his fingers pressed against your clit, sending waves of pleasure crashing through you. your hips picked up the pace, seeking more, and he eagerly gave it, his movements growing more deliberate with every moan that escaped your lips.
âtake it like a good girl⌠â alexis groaned as his head fell back in pleasure
you continued to move, his cock hitting you at the perfect angle inside and the pressure of his digits on your clit motivating you to go faster
âthatâs it, princessâ alexis praised as he watched you bounce up and down
his free hand found your breasts, kneading them as you rode him, your breaths growing more ragged with every thrust
âoh god, youâre so fucking deep! a-alex!â you moaned as you rode his cock
your pace was slowing down as you were growing tired. alex sat up and held you close. your arms rested around his neck and you kissed him passionately as he thrusted into you while you sat on his lap
âsay my name again baby, say itâ he kissed you on the mouth roughly as his hands held your hips in place and he fucked into you faster now
âalex! fuck⌠iâve wanted your cock inside of me for so fucking long, i need more, please!â you pleaded
your eyes locked onto his, teeth biting down on your lower lip as you felt another orgasm building. your walls tightened around him, and you could see the effect it was having on him, his jaw clenching and his eyes darkening with lust. you leaned forward, your breasts brushing against his chest, and whispered into his ear, "I'm going to cum on your big fucking cockâ
your movements grew erratic as alex pushed you back slightly, giving you a new angle for him to fuck you senselessly in. the two of you made a sort of âvâ shape in this new position as you leaned away from one another and your sex met his in perfect rhythm
your nails dug into his hands that were on your hips, leaving half-moons that would surely bruise. he didn't care, the pain only added to his pleasure, heightening every sensation
the sight was too much for him. your fucked out expression begging for more, your supple tits bouncing as your hips crashed together. he lost control, his orgasm ripping through him like a storm. he filled you with his warmth, his hips jerking as he emptied himself into you.
you came immediately after he did, loving the way you felt his thick cock twitch inside of you
you stopped moving and collapsed onto his chest, your breathing ragged and your heart pounding like a drum in her ears. alexis wrapped his arms around you, holding you close as your breathing gradually returned to normal
âyou okay?â he asked, he felt your body trembling again
âyeah, just hold me okay?â you nuzzled into his chest
âokayâ he said, pressing a sweet kiss to your temple
#alex quackity#alexis quackity#quackity#quackity x reader#quackity fanfic#quackity x y/n#quackity smut
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transfem loop + siffrin... you agree
i does agree.... i does in fact ... write a 7k word essay on the subject..... if you would like to perhaps click that link and read it if you were not already aware...... kisses u on the forehead......... sorry its that long but i had to cover all of my bases you know how it is with textual analysis when you're trying to draw a distinction between "headcanon" and "reading of the text" because those are different things.... to meeeeeeee.......
#a headcanon is when i say shit like loop has feetie pyjamas.#a reading of the text is when i go jesus christ dude im not sure someone that repressed has a particularly great grasp on their ideal Self#lucabytetalks#isat spoilers#back on the homestuck tangent sometimes i think about how ppl picked up on the trans coding of roxy but were so set in their ways that#they thought it mustve been in the past and not a potential future... and then got real mad about a character being like.#complexly transmasc with a nuianced relationship to gender and not Easily Brushed Off Before The Narrative Begins Binary Trans Woman#one of the few times i think ive seen it be That way around? but i think it comes down to that whole. visible transgenderism happening#during the plot vs Invisible transgenderism that shh its okay you dont have to actually think about you can just say for brownie points#BUT MAYHAPS THAT IS MEAN. mayhaps that is mean. but i know what i saw back in the day.#sighs homestuck tangent over anyway uhhh yeah hold on isat fans ill throw you a new bone instead of getting off topic uhhh#isabeau seems like such a pragmatic planner to me i think theyve got contingency plans for whatever family they want to have in future#logical nerd with his transition timeline planned out and it includes a flowchart with an 'IF partner has X then i need Y to have a kid'#shrodingers op isabeau . guy with a gender spreadsheet and punnet squares. i think it being that methodical is funny#it also speaks to his occasional hesitance but thats too dark of a read i think im not going to stake anything serious on that#i have thoughts on isa but they're more obviously aligned with what he literally says with his words in-game. not really much worth#elaborating on besides poking at how his insecurities and appeasement to others might inform his literal decisions#i have maybe a few bullet points in my head for him. not 7k words
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#agatha#agatha all along#can you tell that im so so soooooo bitter about the finale#like i get that some people loved it#good for you#i dont and i'm dying on this hill#yall have every right to be happy about it and talk about how happy you are about it!! but pls keep to your lane#i spent two hours going through the agatha all along tag and there were a handful of people going#the finale wasnt that bad look at the bright side you should be happy about how it ended#bitch. dont tell me how i should enjoy my media#why did she see the darkhold in the cradle and why that reaction?#'is the how nicky died' i dont understand how that prompted her to take such a huge risk#also??? why does rio wanna see agatha die so badly??#and when she did die where was rio? all that build up and fighting without any conclusion to it??#rio just disappeared no conclusion no confrontation not even a word before she kissed Rio and gave her what she wanted which is her death#the build up was really good but the pay off really fell flat and felt rush and agatha ended up feeling like shes sidelined in her own show#even when she had tons of screen time! it just fell flat like agatha deserves better she deserved change and growth and development#she deserved confrontation and facing her feelings not all this continued avoidance and shifting focus onto Billy#she's done too much to have this half assed conclusion to her arc that was built to set up someone elses story like the direction it went#was so gross like every other character had really well written and developed story arcs and conclusions and hers was just???? deflated???#im not even asking for a full on backstory about their relationship bc the show isnt about agatha x rio lmao#them having a happy ending doesnt make narrative sense. what im asking is simply tie up the threads they sewed into the narrative
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I wanna know ur Fontaine msq criticisms đď¸đď¸đIâm all ears
I'm not sure if you wanted me to talk about this secretly or publicly but! Here I go!
The TLDR: Fontaine MSQ aestheticised prison, poverty, child abuse, the justice system/court and didn't properly address any of it.
More:
Focalors/Furina has way too much of a sympathetic angle for a dictator who's lets people drown with her inaction.
Neuvillette feels Bad for sentencing some people to death/prison, but that's it. He's one of the most powerful people in Fontaine. If he felt like there are systemic injustices, I.E sending an abused Child to prison, he should be the first person to DO something about it, not just cry and be sad so the audience can be like aw, that's complex character writing isn't it? No it's not! And guilt doesn't absolve you!!!!!!! (These are stuff we deal with in OTCOJ read my fic now /j)
Meropide has children in it, both Sentenced there (Wriothesley) and BORN THERE (Lanoire), and this is just a quirk of the place. Not only that, Meropide accepts prisoners of all genders and crimes. There are abusers and abuse victims in one place. Do you know how bad that is? How much potential for crimes to happen in a place like thatâ oh wait, Meropide isn't under Fontaine's jurisdiction. If you are assaulted as an inmate it literally means nothing to the court.
Wriothesley had no qualifications when he took over. Depending on how long he lived on the streets, how old he was when he killed his parents, how old he was when he was first taken in by the orphanage, etc, the man might never have more than 4â5 years of formal education. Sigewinne probably had to teach him how to write reports. And do Meropide's spreadsheets. Edit because I forgot to elaborate on this one: This isn't a point brought up anywhere, which is bad, because when poverty and incarceration robs you of a proper education (and the rights to vote in many places too, too, by the way), it reduces your prospects for jobs, reduces many people's ability to get a home etc etc. Wriothesley was just, narratively, Given his position.
Meropide is an industrialized prison, and they portray this as a good thing. Prisoners are paid in coupons for their labour, and this is also portrayed as a good thing.
The One-Meal-A-Day reform was something Paimon gushed about being so great of a perk, that people might want to go to jail for food (could be interesting and reflective of systemic poverty if MHY had brains, but they don't, so I was just Pissed because essentially all Paimon wanted to say was "Prison isn't so bad, but still don't go to prison guys! Prison labour is really hard!"). By the way, in most real-world prisons they are obligated to feed you three meals a day. Because that's how much food a human needs. MHY went with one meal just so they can say "if you want to eat more, you have to work." And then the welfare meal is a goddamn gacha. So imagine you're a starving child who's too weak to work in the fucking robot assembly line, and you wander up for your first meal in 24 hours, only to luck in with a shit one. I'd kill myself.
They wrote Wriothesley, who's a victim of the system, into a guy who's say shit like "I'm the Duke I can do whatever I want" for a cool moment where he choke-slams an inmate (I know he was a bad guy. But also, in copaganda when cops are violent/disregarding protocols, they are always only portrayed to do that against bad guys, so what does our critical thinking tells us about this one?) They wrote Wriothesley, who was an inmate of a prison so bad, so notorious that it is the literal boogeyman of Fontaine, that has a legal (???) fighting pit, with an administrator who abuses his position to be unreasonable, to willingly stay in the place and become an Administrator who would choke-slam an inmate while saying a cool line about how he has the power to do whatever he wants. They wrote him, the guy who had to be fed on the streets by melusines, to think one-meal-a-day was a good enough reform (while he spends god-knows how much on his boat). This wasn't a victim-turns-into-abuser narrative either, they want all this to be seen as positive character growth.
And then, the final kicker is, they gloss over his entire abuse. You can only read about these shit in his profile, which most people don't because they don't Have Him or doesn't care to unlock it/read it online, and they jammed his entire backstory into a flaccid info-dump at the end of his character story quest. This man isn't Allowed to feel abused and neglected and show any reaction to it within the narrative of Fontaine itself, because if they actually Gave Weight to what happened to him, they'd have to confront THE FUCKING JUSTICE SYSTEM they had NO PLANS on criticising. I don't think they ever explicitly said the fucking Crime-Theatre nonsense was Bad either.
I could go on, but this is already so long. But yeah, I hope this gave you an idea.
#and then. and im putting my most controversial opinion in the tags bc im scared lmao. but like... then... you have the fans..... doing......#the same fucking thing.#the amount of times I have seen Wriothesley used as just a side prop for Neuvillette to feel bad about shit. While Wriothesley is just.....#portrayed as having the inner peace and acceptance of a fucking monk. I was shocked when I read some fics I swear#they really said this man has no trauma at all! the stuff in his past? he's over it!#i hate that passivity when writing victims. like ok if One is written like that#sure. but MHY write all their victims like this#I mean look at fucking Lanoire#and Neuvillette sentenced him to prison after he killed his parents who were never confronted by the law. That's canon.#that's more canon than WRLT itself.#why weren't they confronted? did wriothesley try to talk to someone about it? why did he feel like killing them is his only option ?????#at least have there be some sort of conflict and friction there. How does Wriothesley feel about the court and Neuvillette when#this is the literal system that allowed all that shit to happen to him in the first place???#are you Sure he won't be at least a little wary? the fact that some people think he's Grateful to Neuvillette or even idolises him is crazy#because the man literally subjected him to prison. and if you want to portray his prison life as easy breezy and trauma free#you undermine his entire shitty little 'prison reform' narrative#and if you think he'd be completely 100% accepting of the justice system. Then why the fuck would he kill his parents himself#don't you see that the whole 'I'll accept whatever sentence in order to kill my parents' thing in itself is an act of defying the system#and I Hate#this idea. about being some of the most powerful men in the nation. and yet they can't fucking TRY to set up a better system or smth#i can't believe I read a fic where leaving starving street kids croissants is the most they (the characters and the writer) want to do#like. what the fuck. the whole point of that scene is just to make neuvillette feel bad and be like aw......... poor people exist.... OK???#this is literally how MHY would portray him though.... tbf..... This is what ppl would argue as 'in character'#I just think the character they're in is bad.#I will say I'm giving the fic a lot of grief. there's more to the scene than that. and. ultimately.....#fanfic is (saying this through gritted teeth) ........ recreational....................and free........... in the end.................#i dont think this is reflective of the writer. I do think it is reflective of the way the canon material (genshin impact)#presents in the audience who consumes it. most fans only want these guys to fuck anyway. not think about systemic injustices#canon doesn't make it about the systemic injustices either so why should we. the aesthetic of slums and prisons are just there for fun guys#IM JUST CRAZY OK. I SHOULDNT EVEN BE HERE THIS IS NOT FOR ME . I DONT CARE THAT MUCH FOR PEOPLE FUCKING AND I CARE TOO MUCH
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"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"
I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming
#Kind of like some post I saw a long time ago talking about how even the meanest shittiest most difficult to get along with#elderly people or whaever still deserve to have some sort of systems in place to support them so they're not just relying on the#grace of relatives or etc. who may not be able to deal with them. Not saying that I'm like mean and cruel or anything#but the fact of the matter is in most social situations either I am compromising or the other person is. Not in like an ~`ouuu im so weirdd#nobody willever understand my quirky swagg hee heee~' way but like a.. Just factually the things that make me happy and comfortable#are often incompatible with people. The way I communicate and process things is different from the way other people do and that#is always a barrier. I cannot have ''easy''' interactions. Even with 'understanding' people there is nearly always a significant#amount of effort. You can't walk into a group of people and then be like ''okay you guys all have to wear#masks and you also cant play music too loud and also we should communicate turns of speaking very clearly so group conversations#arent too stressful. and also i need this and that and we have to do this and that and '' etc. etc. You CAN. And some people will#go along with that. but they will ALWAYS secretly resent you for it. You will be the one person they're relieved to not have to be around.#theyre glad when you dont show up since they can go back to doing things however they want and not masking and all these boring#annoying things. OR you can say none of that and just deal with the loud music and the talking and the unmasked people. but then#YOU'RE compromising. and no matter how nice they are it's exhausting to be around and youre just further alienated#while in the presence of people and uncofmrtoabel the whole time.#Which I'm not saying the only form of community is a group setting specificially but just giving that as an example lol#I just wish there were a better option than ''well learn to socialize normally or just suffer then'' . Which I know is not what people are#saying. I guess I just always feel a bit scared when 'community is the answer'. Since its not like 'oh im just socially anxious and need to#get out of my shell~!' or something thats really that remedy-able. It's like.. my mostly unchangeable physical health issues combined#with the mostly unchangable literal way that my brain processes sensory informationand other things means that interacting with#others in a normal and easy way is incredibly difficult and often exhausting especially to maintain in any longform fashion. So then#when it's like ''the answer to staying safe is to maintain longform social connections!! :3 just reach out!!'' then.. ermm... O_O#also I'm not even one of the cutesy shy emotional hermits that's nervous. I'm the Bad Stereotype emotionless robotic cold seeming#looms in the corner of the room type of thing so people have less pity on you in that way. -_- ANYWAY gghj#I need like.. a designated social representative or something.. When I did work in that bookshop forever ago they gave me a#person who basically was just with me to help communicate with others on my behalf and supervise me and stuff. I need that.. Some#more extraverted person I can latch onto and they can maintain the Social Support Network for me and I can just be their +1 to all#of the Social Things and community. I have helpful skills I can contribute to other people and stuff it's just like.. I cant socialize lol#I cook food or something for you.. then you keep me in contact with Community.. a deal. (but then what about when I'm too sick to#contribute? as is often the case. there's not much place for people like me in communities sometimes i fear.. sigh.) ***
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saw a post about projecting your ethnicity onto a character and started missing vespa ilkay. so so bad
#pov u grow up in a 3rd world country(/planet) where healthcare workers are exported by the thousands like cheap produce to richer countries#it's your ticket out of poverty as long as you can deal with the loneliness the separation from everyone you know the discrimination etc#ive never talked about my hc that vespas mother was one of them sending money every month visiting every couple of years until it just stop#like why return to the swamps when youre doing fine working on a richer planet w much better living conditions#cost of living rises every year. sending home a % of your salary used to be enough to support your husband and daughter and then it isnt#you know how it goes#vespa is also dead set on this path until ranga realizes that hemorrhaging healthcare workers leaves them with little to none of their own#students on scholarships or in community/state universities are bound by return service agreements and are forbidden to leave the country#until theyve rendered a few years of work on ranga to pay back their tuition + as a really shitty solution to the brain drain problem#this is real in my country btw but my professors say a lot of ppl do break their rsa's and fucked off to work in other countries LOL#our state unis can barely afford decent facilities they do nottt have the budget to chase down their own alumni in other countries!#but the mental image is a bit funny#vespa ilkays first crime: tinakasan ang rsa#i do also think it lines up with her having a network of med friends everywhere in the galaxy (heart of it all) you kind of go into pre/med#expecting most of your classmates to leave to work in other countries eventually. mine are aiming for the usa / uae / europe / japan etc#anyway whether vespa breaks her rsa or not she leaves ranga asap decides to switch careers and the rest is history#i also deeply love the fact that she's superstitious i'm very sad it wasn't highlighted more (i've only heard s1-3)#as someone who did grow up in a rural area and went to more albularyos/folk healers than doctors in my childhood. (they never failed me)#lots of folk illnesses (ex. balis; pasma) local medical superstitions (dont eat noodles in hospital; youll have a really toxic shift) etcc#theres also a lot of potential in tying her past as a rangian + med student + assassin to me idk how to word this properly#being raised on cautionary tales of not to touch/disturb anything in the swamps then being given free reign to poke & prod at things in her#lab classes (now with the proper ppe)....she was having so much fun with the curemother prime too lmao#years of walking hanging bridges docks boathouses in ranga etc gave her great balance & stealth#cracking open alien shellfish in the swamps to cutting open bodies for studying then for assassination....#I MISS HER SO MUCH BALIK KN SAKEN đđđđđđ#i get why most people + the canon focuses on her being an assassin bc people find that cooler i guess#but vespa being a swamp girl > 3rd world med student > assassin is so personal To Me. the whole pipeline. eugh.#skl.txt
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so there's a trans woman who goes to the centre and everyone calls her by her birthname which she is like... fine with but only because she has no choice but to be fine about it. anyways I've known her for a while through a trans group before the centre so I asked her today if she'd rather I call her by her birthname or her chosen name and she said she prefers her chosen name but I can call her by her birthname if I want and oh my god I was about to cry for her bc god I really feel that whole situation fjdkdl, I just told her "no I WANT to call you by the name you prefer, that's why I'm asking, I want to make sure it's safe for you if I call you [preferred name]" and she seemed so grateful and I'm just :') eeurrgghh i hate how we have to be grateful with crumbs !!!
its just absolutely wild to me that she's presenting femininely and wears skirts and dresses and everything and uses her preferred name when she writes her name down on stuff and yet everyone at the centre calls her by her birthname and he/him pronouns. like. how are people so fucking rude and oblivious ??? she's even worn a she/her pronoun pin to the centre like.... people are so fucking stupid about trans people I stg.
idk I'm just hoping to make her feel a bit more comfortable and maybe if I start calling her by the right name and pronouns then everyone else will too eventually because I know she doesnt feel safe correcting people. I'm not going to make a big thing of it obviously bc I don't want to put her in danger but I will be using the correct name and pronouns now that I've double-checked with her about it, and if I start feeling like it's making things worse for her then I'll check in with her again at that point. I've honestly been stumbling trying to use he/him for her when I mention her to other ppl because she is just... she/her in my brain. it's what I know she wants to use so it feel fucking awful to use anything else !!!
#and my counselor said smth abt her that rly didnt sit right with me#but i was too scared to challenge her on it and ask what she meant by what she'd said#it might just be that this woman talks too much and will talk my ear off if i let her fjfkdl#and then i wont make friends if i just sit with her every day like i was doing the first couple weeks#but smth abt the way she said smth more like... ''getting sucked into all the stuff [she] has going on''#but said in a more... eugh way#idk it set off transphobia alarm bells in my head. ''ooh man wearing a dress who thinks he's a woman how crazy and perverted'' sort of vibe#I'm just... worried. that my counselor is transphobic lmao. I haven't talked abt any of my gender stuff w her#she can she/her me all she wants lol I don't talk about gender w mental health professionals ever after that initial exp a few yrs ago#I DONT KNOW THOUGH THIS IS JUST RLY MESSING WITH ME#LIKE WHY ARE PEOPLE BEING SO WILLFULLY OBLIVIOUS ???#its really fucking upsetting and I've been trying to not let it get to me too much but jesus fucking christ c'mon people đđđ#im hoping i can maybe help change things for the better bc I'll be someone on her side#since she doesnt seem to have that there. god I've cried abt this a few times bc its just awful#and it rly reminds me a bit of my own situation where i just. grin and bear the misgendering and wrong name#except im a coward compared to her fjdksl i never mention my name or pronouns#i will say though that she has consistently misgendered me no matter how often I've reminded her of my pronouns fjdksl#but like... they/them is difficult. i get that. I can't hold it against her esp bc she's in her like 50s or smth#head in my hands. i wish life were kinder to all of us. i hope one day things can be easier#pippen needs 2nd breakfast#transphobia#transmisogyny#<- for blacklists. i uhhh hope this doesnt turn up in searches but oh well !!!
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How do u get so good at anatomy and faces??? đđđ I adore ur art style and I just wanted to know if you had like a certain method or anything or if u guys practise :0
i just draw a fuckload and observe the human body and how it moves at all times and use references and draw and draw and draw summore đ u may not now how tf muscles link together but with plenty of drawing and research it will eventually click into place and you'll Get It lmfao
#in fact i can literally feel myself Getting it when it comes to arm and back muscles and i feel like ive finally been set free tbh#like its all clicking together after being like 'i have no idea how the forearm muscles twist but ig ill put shading here'' for years lmfao#i would wrack my brain over the ''the whole arm is built like chain links'' rule but it never really clicked UNTIL RECENTLY#and its bc if drawing thats right folks call of duty corn AHAAA#but thats also why im drawing my buff ocs is bc i feel like every drawing i do i understand the muscle structure a little bit more its gr8#so expect more muscle studs bc im on a diSCOVERY#that being said dont wreck urself drawing a lot u also have to be observant as well and try to see if you can learn more thhe next drawing#is what i do#thats why i cant stop wont stop im too in love with improving more and more and how much stuff i can pick up on and incorporate into my dra#wings OK IM DONE
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having thoughts about what makes an interesting idol rhythm game
#i can expand upon it but i think its mostly like. what's the gimmick it's using and how is it executing it#like enstars you have the 3d mvs that you can put whoever you want in and have different outfits to put them in#d4dj you have the dj booth layout that you play with and it utilizes it very well#hypmic is a rap based game entirely and also utilizes record scratching imagery in its gameplay#and then proseka and bandori. proseka's gimmick is very obviously like vocaloids#but in the game play its trying to be too many things and failing at all of them#they have some 3d mvs but the layout of the beat maps makes them like#not really. something i notice when i played it. bc the way they have the map layout set up it kinda grays out the video#which means you might as well not have it on. for enstars the lanes are entirely transparent#so you can see the mv clearly as you play if you have 3d mv on u know#and then like. idk the proseka gameplay just feels brutal.#mostly because it times when you lift off the hold notes and literally no other game does this#even games that use goods as combo breakers like hypmic dont fucking do that#also i do appreciate the flick notes in hypmic being just. flick whereever feels natural#helps a lot while playing to just flick whichever way you want#but anyway yeah i think proseka is relying too much on the vocaloid schtick and people just ignore the atrocious game play#like d4dj does straight lane better. hypmic and enstars are both ring lanes that do their gimmicks well#i do not like proseka can u tell#i didnt play enough bandori to really tell u whats going on there but i did not like the layout for their game#and its made by the same people who make proseka so like. no hope for me getting into it#anyway#shay speaks
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hello upper middle class northern usamerican tumblr user. i want to play a game. you will notice that you are in a super america convenience store in rural kentucky - you have three minutes to purchase a snack and drink of your choice and make normal small talk with the cashier. however, if you use the word "cryptid" or generally make reference to appalachia and its inhabitants as "wild", uncivilized, or lacking restraint around alcoholic beverages during your time here, i will personally tie you to the chassis of a four wheeler and tip it into the river. live or die. make your choice
#speak friend and enter#i can appreciate mothman as much as the next guy but can we stop treating appalachia like it's the subject of a richard attenborough doc#i come from a long line of hillbillies and i like to think i've got a good sense of humor about it but sometimes i am tested#like. this is not a lawless land with a moonshine still in every holler and nameless voices in the woods!! this is a normal town!!#idk maybe i'm reading too much into it but i'm just tired of the cultural fetishization of appalachia by people who aren't from here#and who don't know anything about it. like yeah you know mothman and what hooch is and that's all well and good#but do you know what the opioid epidemic really is. do you know about the structural injustices that keep people like mcconnell in power#i'm not saying you have to apply dialectical political analysis to every issue that occurs in the region to be able to have an opinion#but also like. i'm tired of people looking at places like where i grew up and making them into things they aren't#like. on the one hand we have ''ooh spooky hills!! run if you hear the trees whisper your name''#and on the other we've got ''isn't appalachia so depressing...so hashtag ethel cain core...shame it's got no value beyond aesthetics''#and on yet another hand we have ''i - a person with no ties to the region - am going to take up the cause of every social issue#occurring across the entire appalachian region so the world will see just how bad these poor hill people have it. i am very smart''#and like. it's frustrating#i'm not saying you should never speak about appalachia if something we have is interesting to you#nor am i implying that i want to gatekeep discussion of the region's issues to the community bc that won't accomplish anything#i'm just saying that like any place it's complex. it's got its good things and it's got its bad things.#and you shouldn't isolate the good from the bad or vice versa - especially if you don't know the context in which those things happen.#and for the love of god dont let your own ignorance cause you to boil down those issues into a reductive and inaccurate set of stereotypes#learn about us from us. not from tiktok not from movies and for christ's sake not from hillbilly elegy. i hate that fucking book#anyway that got weirdly serious but i mean it. putting appalachia as a talking point up on the shelf until y'all can speak intelligently#ok to rb
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The Flowerheart!
(purposely didn't colour in Feli's tie and Hal's glove, it's like they're subtly trying to match :3 while also seemingly missing a piece of one another). Honestly though, in regards to Hal's sexuality, he's like that one tweet: "I'm probably nonbinary but I have a job so idrc bout that rn." He's definitely queer, but he's too busy with getting in danger his job to even bother with that so he just gets the queer label!
Neither of them confessing orz... They love each other so much yet neither of them are confessing... Hal being overprotective of Feli but in a way where it isn't even all that known by anyone but Feli and her the people really close to them. Hal doing his job is half-wanting to keep their city safe and half-wanting to keep Feli from any harm. He aint letting anyone hurt her that's for sure.
Relationship chart is made by @bengallemon !
#ariart#ariaoc#taking my weekly or so dosage of drawing my own ocs to get used to drawing em so i can draw em easily without the Demons#aka the nagging voice at the back of my head shouting at the fact that they arent as perfect as i see em in my head. only with my ocs smh#hal being a gift giver in the sense of ''i dont really need these so you can have them'' even tho he really purposely got those for feli#and feli doing acts of service in the sense of ''its part of my job to do this so just stay put'' even tho she wont do that for anyone else#ngl doing this made me sad cuz am made even more aware just how badly i set these two up. like they love each other sooo much#but cant even show it freely at all! they always gotta give out excuses to make it seem like it isnt purposely directed at the other#and not even in a tsundere way! cuz if it was up to them theyd be so publicly open bout their love for one another but its just#that the very world theyre living in is just so harsh that they both know it. hal cant show any weakness and he doesnt wanna#endanger feli and feli knows that too! she doesnt wanna endanger hal any more than hes alrdy constantly endangering himself#so the both of em just... puts the other within arms reach. even farther than that too! AND ITS SO SAD!#its like romeo and juliet but instead of opposing family conflicts its the entire world being the biggest danger there is#so the most selfish act feli and hal can do is keep their love for one another trapped within their own hearts#with only the silence between them their only means of communicating their ''i love yous'' cuz the world is too cruel
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So deeply upset abt WWDITS being cancelled what the fuck
#OFMD I understand#cuz it sort of had a wrap up#s2 wasnât that good too unfortunately#so itâs more understandable but still unfortunate#WWDITS tho????#like I understand it hs 6 seasons but thereâs SO much theyâre setting up#and one More Season will most likely not be enough time to wrap all of them up#like nandermo?????#my 10 season slowburn????#NOPE FUCK ME IG#or guidja??? will there even be time for that???#will they even include that???#and how will they wrap up nandor finding out Guillermo got. turned by someone else????#like I need at least 2 seasons of Angst for that#1 for him to be angry#and one for him to forgive him#and like everything w/ Nadjaâs curse???#and Colin Robinson and Lazlo???? whatâs gonna Happen there????#I just dont think it will have a satisfying conclusion and itâs really upsetting and unfortunate :((((#wwdits#what we do in the shadows
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Sometimes i wonder if the reason Sora held Kairi's hand like that at the end of KH3 is because he was giving her lucky charm back to her
#this is not a theory. there is no evidence for this at all so dont really take this seriously but sometimes i just think about it#'be sure to bring it back to me.' would thinking you are never coming back be a good time to fulfill that promise#and i feel like it would really go with the theme melody of memories set up too with her being one of the keys to finding sora#kingdom hearts#bee speaks#she literally says its a charm to help find eachother if they get separated. HOW MUCH MORE SEPARATED COULD THEY BE
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guess who was not in the right emotional state to finish watching lars and the real girl
#what a lovely movie....#talkys#i obviously related a lot to him and his mannerisms. and such. among all the rest of it.#augh. something about watching him kiss bianca at the end before it happens#something about that being so familiar! a movie about loneliness.#a movie about loneliness... watching loneliness acted out while i act out loneliness.#the way that i can so physically feels how lars feels both in his relationship with bianca but also the moments where he wants More.#it burns...relatable but hurt to watch in the sense that he finds resolution and im staring at the credits sitting hollow#really funny too that he had that way out of things with bianca...bc i have a similar Out set up with al...#if one day i dont need him anymore...#augh....what a nice movie...#it hurts so bad but its a wonderful movie...#i like how everyone support him...! made me cry#the way ryan gosling talks in this movie is the exact way i talk to my siblings sometimes too.#when i feel small. and very much like their little brother who is 15; 12; + 9 years younger than them. AUGH.#hurts it hurts it hurts. good movie what a nice movie
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Why did I just see a Sanji figure dressed as Messi
#Who made that oh god#it's so ugly too#i wonder if there's more with the set#i really dont like when this whole championship or whatever comes up it's like Argentinins get 150% more annoying#I cant argue Sanji could be a good futbol player but pls#this is giving me so much cringe and second hand embarrassment#Sanji Messi what in the fuck is that do you know how that sounds#like idk fucking shitpost#me blabbering
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the irony of one the first main things established about omori as a character is that he's known for his great memory as if he hasn't lost the entire fucking plot repeatedly for years.
like he has a great memory!! if you don't take into account He's Actually The God Of Repression.
#replaying the game aggaaaiinnnn#now with full appreciation for foreshadowingggg#omori#omori spoilers#raven rambles#.....should probably have like a tag specifically for playing incase people wanna block it lmfao#raven plays omori#fr though he has a great memory until he forgets minor details like he was designed to help sunny forget everything#goddddddd it kinda makes you wonder though how much of it he's aware of#it's implied he still remembers basil after deep well. but I dont know if he's aware he's actively causing everyone else's#memory of him to disappear. like yeah yeah deep well is designed to make him forget too. he set himself up#to make sure sunny never reached blackspace. the loop resets if they fail. if they die#but the whole branch coral dialogue makes it seem like yes. omori is still very aware of basil's existence.#I have a lot of thoughts on deep well.#and especially omori not really realizing he's the one sending basil to blackspace because in past loops it was stranger who confronted him#his guilt of leaving basil is the one thing still tying sunny to the real world. mari is dead. he can't do anything about that except forge#basil is still alive.#as long as he remembers that basil exists#he will keep unknowingly dragging himself back to blackspace. blackspace would stay hidden if stranger wasnt haunting him lmao#he starts the loop by sending him there and then follows through on it by searching for him because he's not yet aware its his own fault#idk it's. aaaaaaaaaaaa#the hug in the true ending is everything to meeeeeee#I have a lot of thoughts about blackspace too but not right nowww thats an essay for much laterrrrr#there's just something about the âdeity forgets theyre a deity and rediscovers it later and denies it and forgets againâ that kills me#ESPECIALLY WITH THE FUCKING TIME LOOP#and then there's the route additions. he can accept it but he'll try to fight sunny to end it one final time#looooookkkk I'm veryyyy norMALLL ABOUT THIS GAAAAME#hylia and omori remind me of each other in their sort of ignorance of their own power. hylia being the reincarnations of zelda#see it all loops back to just Tropes I Fucking Love#there's a pattern here. do you see the pattern?
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